Challenges of Life

The last two years have had their challenges.  Reassignments or new season's depending on your perspective have lent themselves to reevaluate mist areas of my life.   During my initial struggle regarding this change, God used Warren Wiersbe book to encourage my heart, and mind.  The quote that left a big impression us, "Lord guide my path, chose my joys, protect my name, and bless my work."   All in all He has done this very well.  With God's help through the scriptures, friends, family, and my church I can honestly give Him the glory, for only He could keep me from being angry, wanting to lash out, and to fall into fear of the future. Having not been wise with my finances, and although the loss if over half my income, He proved to be more than capable to handle them.  Nothing is impossible for our God!  He was present day and night, during the highs and lows, the attacks of condemnation from the enemy through negative thoughts, and doubts which he threw at me.  But the Lord, and His Word were my defence, my comfort, and truth!  Feelings were not meant to fight those fiery arrows that taunted me day and night.  If the accusations had some semblance of truth, I confessed them, and accepted the Lord's forgiveness, and moved forward.  Now, this season is behind me, but a new mountain lies before me. Fortunately, my Lord never changes.  He saw me through this last testing,  He will see me through this trial as well.  I praise Him for this assurance.  Psalm 119:58-59

I have been struggling with some health issues, and find it difficult to participate  in the activities I love.  As a result, I am ashamed to say, anger, self pity, and what I did not give into in the past two years, I have allowed to color my attitude, and behavior.  When I went to bed last night, my Lord and I talked frankly.  One of the beauties of my Lord is, He was waiting for me to come to the realization of my poor state mentally, and spiritually.  Psam 119:65-72

That truth came during a discussion with a dear friend, I honestly heard what I was saying and feeling. Not a pretty sight!   One lesson over the years I have learned, not always applied immediately, recognize the problem, confront it, confess it, and leave not with the Lord!  With no bungey cord attached.  During this time  I offended a friend who is no longer speaking to me, argued about a bible lesson, as if I was a theologian, and withdrew from my Lord and my devotional o times.  Oh, Instill read the Word, but not with my heart engaged during that time.  Cold, cold heart!  Why?  Good question, I and the Lord are working through this even as I write.  Psalm 139:23-24

Like Paul, I ask why do I do what I do not want to do, and not do what I want to do?  Pride, thinking I have a right to be angry, wanting to stomp my feet, and have a hissy fit!   Probably all apply, sad but true.  The cure?  Repent, confess, and move on with the Lord to whatever He deems best for my life!  The enemy attacks when you are down, and often with me, use my friends as tools either to cause pain or as a sounding board where our conversations would echo back to my ears.  Not a pretty sight for a believer!  Proverbs 18:1

My new focus is, "...quicken my conscience by the holiness of God, to purge my imagination by the beauty of God, to open my heart more to the love of God, and to devote my will to the purpose of God."   Thanks again, to Mr. Wiersbe.   This season will end, but God in all His glory, wonder,  and besuty will always be the same, and tjose of us who brlong to Him, will have all eternity to sing His praises, and worship Him in a deeper way.  He is ever present,  I intend to enjoy Him more and more.  Proverbs 18:15